Nigerian Dating Scams

As I noted in my last blog I experienced the Nigerian Dating Scam that has been featured on Oprah. After the "Irish" Nigerian who wanted me to send him 5K, another fellow and I exchanged emails. He said he was a 66 year single dad and lived in California. Again his emails seemed disjointed so after the first few I received I stopped emailing him back. A couple of days later I received a bouquet of 50 red roses and a teddy bear delivered to my job. The card threw me for a loop. The guy professed his undying love. I had told him in my first couple of emails where I worked. (not so smart). Suddenly I thought I had a crazy stalker and was real glad he didn't have my home address or phone number. I emailed him that evening and told him I wasn't impressed and he needed to stop. I actually was a little scared he might show up after work so I took several precautions. Mike, Michelle, Brooklyn, Maddie and I went to Sacramento for the holiday and that Friday when I returned to work I received another even bigger bouquet, a teddy bear and a box of chocolates.(Where is forrest Gump when you need him) When I got home that night I started thinking about Nigerian scams and googled it and found a website dedicated to Nigerian Dating Scams. It seems they go into dating sites, put pictures they have stolen off of the Internet and post profiles of people that seem quite genuine. When they don't have any luck "hooking" the man or women they are trying to scam they start sending flowers purchased with stolen credit cards. The person sending me the flowers was actually text book in how the scam works. Unfortunately he didn't realize he was dealing with someone who was neither desperate, lonely or stupid to send money or fall for their scam. I called the flower company and said I understood they could not tell me who sent the flowers but I told them I thought they were paid for with a stolen credit card. I "suggested" they check because I felt there would be a third order placed. She checked and said I was right it was done with a stolen credit cards.

From my research on the web I learned that in the last 90 days men and women from the US have sent over a million dollars to Nigerians whom they think they are in love with. I spent the better part of Sunday reading the saddest emails from people who have been scammed. It is hard to understand why someone would fall for the scams but they do. I followed the instructions on the website sending them the email address of this person, and blocked them from being able to communicate with me and reporting the incident on an FBI website for this particular problem. I also reported them to the dating web site so they pulled their profile and I pulled mine. I am not going to use this website again although I know what to look for.



I did meet a very nice man and we lunch this week and then dinner on Friday night. He is 72 years old and very involved in the Episcopalian Church. He is very nice and unfortunately we have something in common. He lost his only child to cancer ten years ago. When we had dinner he brought a poem he had written when his son died and it reminded me so much of the poem I wrote when Mary Etta died. He is very close to his daughter in law who has never re-married and his twin grandchildren so he isn't alone alone. But seeing the sad desperation in someones eyes who has lost a child makes you wish you didn't have this in common. No matter how long it has been you recognize the pain. I don't know if he will call me again but I enjoyed meeting him.



So I know there are good men out there I just need to hone my skills in reading their initial emails to weed out the scammers.

As I mentioned above we went to Sacramento for Thanksgiving and it was wonderful but too short. The highlight was seeing Brooklyn meet her Uncle Isaac. It was the most poignant moment. Brooklyn looked into his eyes like she was imprinting him on her soul and vice versus. You can see this moment on http://fieldsfamilywebsite.web.officelive.com/Brooklyn.aspx . I don't think I have ever seen this kind of a moment before and we all saw it. It was as if she knew him. It was a Kodak moment and thank goodness Michelle took a picture.

Another exciting bit of news. I was offered a promotion at work. And after careful consideration I accepted. It is more money and a lot more work but I think it is the first step to the position I want that will bring me back to Oregon in a few years. I work closely with this position that is located in our field offices and I don't think for the most part it is being done very well and I think I can not only do it but set a model for the rest of the field offices. In part from my experience at Xerox/Tektronix. I didn't think I was really interested in another career but apparently I was wrong. My competitive nature seems to take control. After I was offered the position I knew I couldn't reject it and see someone else get the position. Of course I felt honored being asked because I am truly the one with the least seniority but I think I have the best experience for the position and apparently my manager and the VP thought so too.

Well it is time to get on with my day,
Love to you and yours,
NanaCarol